In a move that feels extremely Boulder and somehow also oddly believable, city officials have “announced” a bold new transportation initiative: the gradual elimination of left turns across Boulder.

The stated goal? Improve pedestrian flow, reduce idling emissions, and create what the city is allegedly calling a more “mindful, circular driving experience.” Under the so-called Right Is Enough Mobility Plan, drivers would now be encouraged to reach every destination through a series of strategic right turns, neighborhood loops, and what one imaginary planner described as “a more scenic relationship with your errands.”

According to the proposal, intersections near Downtown, Pearl Street, and major bike corridors would be the first to go left-turn-free. Officials claim the change would reduce traffic conflict points, keep cars moving more efficiently, and make crossings safer for pedestrians, cyclists, scooters, dogs in backpacks, and people carrying oat milk lattes.

Naturally, this would mean your quick stop at the grocery store could now involve:

• passing it once,

• circling the block,

• accidentally ending up in North Boulder,

• and rethinking every choice that led you here.

The rollout would also include:

• “Right Turn Only” educational signage

• a pilot program called Loop Local

• and a city map showing the most efficient no-left-turn routes to places like Ideal Market, Chautauqua, and that one coffee shop you swear is easier to get to on foot anyway.

Residents are, of course, pretending to be divided. Some are applauding the “visionary climate-forward thinking,” while others are reportedly concerned that picking up takeout will now require the same route-planning skills as a cross-country road trip.

From fake traffic policy to actual culture plans: here’s your first look at Boulder Arts Week.

While Boulder is not actually banning left turns, Boulder Arts Week is very much real — and it kicks off Friday, April 3, with performances, exhibits, open studios, dance, music, and art events happening across the city through April 12.

Friday’s lineup is stacked, with highlights including the Downtown Boulder Art Walk, NoBo First Friday, performances at the Dairy Arts Center, live music at Roots Music Project, exhibits at BMoCA, and a full day of creative programming from galleries, studios, libraries, and community spaces all over town.

We’ll have a fuller roundup in Friday’s issue, but consider this your official heads-up: Boulder’s art scene is about to be very busy in the best way.

Friday, April 3

Full-time

Boulder dates blend nature and culture effortlessly. Stroll Pearl Street Mall for coffee and people-watching, wander the Boulder Creek Path, or catch golden hour beneath the Flatirons at Chautauqua Park. For something laid-back, North Boulder’s breweries and eateries keep things casual and cozy.

👉 Vote and we’ll share the top picks—chosen by locals—in an upcoming issue. 💌